As a newly licensed Funeral Director in 1997, the founder of 3ABF, Michele Lara, planned to develop a business to provide comprehensive funeral arrangement services for the broad-based community. Ms. Lara soon discovered that God had another plan as she became increasingly aware of the gap in bereavement services available to low-income families. Indigent and low-income bereaved families are confronted with substantial expenses, which many of them find difficult if not impossible to meet, resulting in potential delays for funeral services and significant anguish to the families.
Ms. Lara felt led by God to do something and, thus, 3ABF was incorporated as a faith-based 501(c)(3) nonprofit organization in 1997 to provide bereavement support services for indigent and low-income families. The original idea that continues to hold true today, is to "Assist, Arrange and Accompany". Specifically, to assist and accompany families through the process of making funeral and interment arrangements for their loved ones.
3ABF serves bereaved families near or at the poverty level in the Houston Metropolitan Area. We concentrate on indigent and low-income families who have suffered through the ordeal of long-term illnesses or are shattered by unexpected losses. On the most part, "needy", "poor" and/or "low-income" are not synonymous with homeless or jobless. Most of the families served by 3ABF are classified as the working poor. These are the loved ones of crime victims, AIDS patients, the severely disabled, the elderly on fixed incomes, stillborn infants, babies and children with birth defects or terminal illnesses, runaways, etc. Over 95% of the families we serve are classified as ethnic minorities and reside in the City of Houston. Family Support Services are made available to all referrals.
“the funeral ritual . . . is a public, traditional and symbolic means of expressing our beliefs, thoughts and feelings about the death of someone loved . . . [It] helps us acknowledge the reality of the death, gives testimony to the life of the deceased, encourages the expression of grief . . . provides support to mourners, allows for the embracing of faith and beliefs about life and death, and offers continuity and hope for the living.”1
All families served by 3ABF are economically disadvantaged. 71% of these households have at least one working adult – evidence that the majority of our families consist of working-poor residents, versus individuals seeking to live off of government assistance. Yet, the ability to cover funeral expenses is virtually impossible for uninsured low-income families and a lack of resources translates to literal delays or even cancellations of bereavement services. Of these over 500 families served each year, over 25% have had to reschedule services two to four weeks or longer after the death of a loved one due to their inability to pay for funeral and/or burial services.
The City of Houston currently does not have any programs that provide bereavement assistance to needy families. Harris County has an Indigent Burial Program; however, unless you are at a county facility, to be eligible for funding consideration the request must be made within 48 hours of the death. In addition to the time constraint, Harris County's definition of indigent is very narrow. Thus, there are a significant number of families that are eligible to apply for County assistance, but miss the deadline for services; or who, though are classified as low-income, are not poor enough to qualify for services. When families are eligible, the Indigent Burial Department is a payer of last resort; therefore, funeral services may be delayed for days while the County exhausts all measures to confirm that the family does not have access to resources for funeral and/or burial expenses.
Unless a family receives support from Harris County or through Crime Victim Funds (state funding to support families whose loved ones were victims of violent crimes), the cost of funeral services will be high. The base cost to cover services and burial expenses for a small child is between $3,000 and $4,000. Adult expenses (generally for persons ten and older since the determining factor is actually size versus age) will average between $4,500 and $5,500, depending on the funeral home providing the services. The Texas Funeral Service Commission regulates the funeral industry; however, the Commission does not regulate pricing. Consequently, costs vary across communities and across cultures. Since funeral homes customarily require full payment in advance of service provision, the combination of expenses and payment requirements often appear insurmountable by families that are already struggling to make financial ends meet.
3ABF provides services to low-income families regardless of ethnic, social, religious or cultural background. Services include:
Family Support Services“Helping Hands” – Though financial need is what prompts families to call 3ABF, Helping Hands is the heart of what we do. 3ABF advises and accompanies family members through all aspects of preparing for funeral and interment services.
Crisis AssistanceServices – Consultations and referrals to families prior to the death of a loved one. 3ABF provides encouragement and advice to every family, who needs assistance.
Bereaved Family Assistance Fund (BFAF) – 3ABF provides Emergency financial support to assist in avoiding delays in funeral services. see Financial Assistance.
After Care Services – 3ABF provides follow-up services to families at 3 and 6 month intervals after the initial office contact to monitor the need for counseling, social services or emergency assistance.
Crime Victim Services – 3ABF provides assistance through the difficult task of filing for Crime Victims’ Compensation Benefits and Crime Victims’ Appeals.
Grief Counseling – Informal and professional grief counseling services are available for up to one year to immediate family members (spouses, children, siblings, and/or parents) on a group and/or individual basis.
Educational Lectures for the Community – Workshops and talks are provided in low-income neighborhoods to increase public awareness and educate residents about all aspects of bereavement planning and how to secure adequate, affordable insurance.
1. WHY IS THE FUNERAL RITUAL IMPORTANT, by Alan D. Wolfelt, Ph.D., Center for Loss and Life Transition
